20 Worst Status Updates Ever

I may be guilty of a number of these, so I am passing no judgment on any of my facebook friends. But really:

1. "Friday can't come fast enough!" "Can't wait for the weekend" "Longest week everrrr.\

2. Solicitations for money for charities.

3. Health updates- TMI! For your immediate family that are concerned for you, CALL THEM or at least send a private message.

4. Politics.

5. SUPER long status updates- please no longer than 2 lines. We get bored.

6. "Just got back from the gym!" "LOVES spin class" "Went to the gym for the 28th day in a row!"

7. "Bored at work- someone come visit me"

8. Children's sleeping habits.

9. Wedding planning updates, or "48 days until the big day!"

10. Counting down to some event that no one else is going to. Especially when you don't say what it is. "7 days until the best day ever!"

11. Spoiling a TV show. Some of us watch it on hulu later. Try to remember that.

12. Depression. "Just can't do it another day" (Disclaimer: If you really are clinically depressed, please get some help! We care!)

13. Nonsensical quotes.

14. Passive-aggressive statuses meant to make your ex feel bad.

15. "So tired from my trip to Spain" "So tired from working and homework and class. ugh" "SO TIRED!"

16. Alcoholic's complaints about yet another hangover.

17. Overuse of obscure song lyrics.

18. Pleas for fb friends to come to your show.

19. Repeated statuses about love.

20. "is in class" Well, that's nice that you want the world to know how much you AREN'T paying attention.


Anonymous said...

why hasn't that queer Hunter been posting much?

Cait said...

So, what statuses are acceptable? Sheesh girl, high standards! Although I really can't stand people talking about being pregnant, or how many days till they are due, etc. And I'm totally guilty of wedding statuses.... and political statuses, and "can't wait till friday" statuses.... woops! :)

kels said...

Lets give it up with the passive aggressive tweets as well, friends.

HesstonsHullabaloo said...

In anthropology we call this phenomena "Self Talk". I should do a study on this haha.

Anonymous said...

Facebook has ruined us.

Jims Porter said...

So, it's pretty apparent that I'm not a consistent Facebook status updater (and the few times I have updated, I don't think I've ever been guilty of any of the above). But, as one who has read many a'status on FB, I'd have to agree with Cait... What can people post statuses about?

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